I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
Randomize
