Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
I found the TV remote. It was in the washing machine along with the chicken wings you kept complaining to Domino's about that they 'never delivered'
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
While in Europe, he bought me a pouring tap to put on my liquor so I don't spill. This means 2 things.1) He really loves me. 2) I'm a noticeable alcoholic.
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
Randomize
