The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
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