Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman.
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
Randomize
