She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
i think it was just a coincidence but she literally vomited the second she saw my penis.
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
He needs to seriously stop texting me at 3am for sex. Late night and early morning hours are for the guys who DON'T bust a nut in the first 5 minutes of making out.
Yeah minute men are best for late afternoons when you're inbetween running errands and have nothing to do.
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
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