can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
There is a such thing as a wonderpuss octopus. Officially my new favorite animal.
What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
I jerked off enough times today to safely commit to the fact that im not getting laid tonight
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
I hate about 85% of people that I meet. I'm an awful person. In reality my only redeeming qualities are my face, my amazing scissoring skills and the fact that children love me.
True on all accounts.
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
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