Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
North Korea, Best Korea!
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
Woke up this morning on my doorstep in a basket with a branch, a lipstick lightning bolt on my head and a sign that said "the boy who lived." i love you guys.
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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