I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
I'm about one sudden movement away from being able to cross "throw up in a fortune 100 company's bathroom" off my bucket list.
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
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