So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
I am midnight drunk by noon
how was last night?
i woke up with my hand stuck in a jam jar with my keys in the bottom and a dog licking peanut butter off my boobs. you tell me.
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
I just soaked a sugar cookie in nail polish remover to clean off my nails because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom to get a cotton ball. Is this what rock bottom feels like?
Send help, water and tortillas.
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
Randomize
