there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
Come share oat with me in your robe
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
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