I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
Walk-of-shaming home from Brooklyn in a Jesus costume that has "what wouldn't Jesus do" written on the robe.
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
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