the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
Pretty sure the cop told you that you were the first person he pulled over for being drunk on a tractor. So there's that.
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
Randomize
