So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
Girl last night got so wet when I was going on down her it flooded up my nose. I nearly drown
I'm at my inlaws playing Scrabble. Go Fuck Yourself.
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
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