butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
What changed your mind?
Being sober
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
Randomize
