the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
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