There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
I'm pretty stoned, and for a second I forgot that I'm not actually Barbie and I was getting excited about all the fun we were going to have on my jet.
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
I almost rear ended this hot guy driving a Porsche Cayenne just so I could get his phone number
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