this morning my mom told me to get a new vibrator because mine was too loud last night
i fell asleep watchin iron chef that was the blender she heard. i dont even own a vibrator
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
