He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
Poorly worded request for dick pic resulted in stoned beanie selfies and "lol". Miscommunication is the devil's cock block.
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
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