it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
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