It made me feel like I need a reality show of my life so I could go back and watch the episodes to figure out how I got from the trunk of the car to my neighbors tree house...
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
i wish i could tell my students that all of their lessons plans were brought to them by captain morgan and diet coke. it's like seasame street, only for high schoolers being taught by a student teacher.
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
I’m home. Please don’t call me unless you have an arterial bleed or you’re on fire. Love you 😘
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize
