love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
She just tried to talk over a fart. The fart was way longer than the sentence she originally wanted to say so she just added gibberish to the end. Gross
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
It's an open bar. I'm gonna be gone when you get here.
Text me the address now before you're too drunk to text English.
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
'valentine' just autocorrected to 'cake robe' in my phone
I think that summarizes my life up pretty accurately
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
Randomize