Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
Xanax induced break ups are the best. Since I'm a professional fiancee, I'm going to break up with them on Xanax from now on. It didn't hurt one tiiiiiny bit.
If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
You layed on my kitchen floor with a pile of m&ms at your crotch, said "your lightbulb don't match, is that one new?"
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
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