I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
I'd just like to say before I start drinking tonight that not only do I not find you attractive; I don't want to hook up with you, suck your dick, be your "suga mama" or have your babies. Please disregard any texts, phone calls or voicemails that say otherwise..
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
We're having soft pretzels and cheese dip for dinner tonight. Like fucking adults.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
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