Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
I'm gonna hire strippers dressed like the founding fathers.
When did we convert life to cartoon?
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
i now understand why vodka
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
My farts smell like burning tires and false courage
How do I stop your cat from bathing me? I'm afraid she'll get drunk off my sweat
Randomize
