wakey wakey hands off snakey
At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
Randomize
