id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
One day I'll learn not to get drunk on a plane. Today is not that day.
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
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