i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
I had a dream last night that I had sex with Abe Lincoln. I must stop watching the History Channel before I go to bed.
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
Randomize
