Apparently the guard had to repeat "you're too drunk to get in" three times before I understood. I guess he was right.
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
How the hell does my fucking boss know about the goddamned magician I fucked?!?
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
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