How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
splinters make it hard to masturbate
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
Randomize
