was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
On the plus side, he ate me out and gave me an orgasm. But he also talked about robots during sex and mispronounced it like the dad in the goldbergs and called them “robits”
Randomize
