If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
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