Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
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