I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
Randomize
