smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
She spilled creme de menthe on her crotch and I told her she looked like a menstruating Vulcan (costume idea!). Obviously, I went home alone.
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
Randomize
