At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
I'm beginning to think the only reason I get laid anymore is girls are fantasizing sleeping with my dad...
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
Randomize
