office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
Apparently I whispered "Jesus was here" and bailed out of the moving taxi.
figured you should hear this from me. Your refrigerator door is way broken. I opened it last night when i was drunk and tried to climb the shelves. i got to the one with the mustard.
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
Nobody cheats on THIS.
Randomize
