Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
Randomize
