I'm gonna have a badass scar
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.
Drunk walkin through police station. America
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
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