Yea I just took my 1st pregnancy test. Turns out I am just fat. Also I haven't been with anyone in 3 months, which is clearly making me crazy.
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
You can't just leave with hair like that
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
