But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
I am going to tweet NASA until they put me into space
Those rocketship riding assholes need the common man
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
So my mom wants to hear about my weekend. How do I make licking cupcake frosting off your face while high not sound like just that?
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
I'd give anything to be driving a pirate ship wearing nothing but a coconut bra and a grass skirt eating a pizza and watching dolphins jump in the waves. Dreams ya gotta have dreams
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
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