PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
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