fuck, i never want to drink again I drunk dialed matt last night and broke up with him the second night in a row. FUCK QUADFEST
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
I just matched the dude who's car I rear ended 2 years ago on tinder. I don't think he remembers.
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
Randomize
