Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
I'm gonna fight the coyote
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Randomize
