im gay
i know
yea but for you.
I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
Getting dome in the backseat of a friends car with Ariana Grande playing in the background was probably the most romantic part of my night
Somehow i instagrammed my acceptance letter while blacked out. Then my grandma was the first to comment on it. I got over 50 likes....Phd here I come....
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
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