is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
Don't make this awkward for me. Don't let your mom come near the bathroom. I can't meet your mom for the first time while I'm shitting. Dont make this awkward.
Fact: Chilis at the airport in JAX will serve you shots of jack at 6:45 with breakfast. Ya I missed my flight.
So when does your new flight leave?
At my shot/hour ratio.... I leave in 16 shots. I love flying
I have no idea where I am, where my pants are, there is cheese stuck to my ass.. Why do I have your phone?
shot for shot with some guy twice your age to prove Detroit hustles harder then you left with him. We're tracking you
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
Randomize
