Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
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