He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
i called him pencil dick in front of over half of his fraternity brothers...
...never gotten so many high fives in my life! fuck ya i win!
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
Randomize
