Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
Being drunk isn't an excuse for eating all of the bacon asshole
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Randomize
