North Korea, Best Korea!
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
You won't wear your Santa suit, I can't get trashed, and you won't use handcuffs! This is the worst Christmas EVER.
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
Randomize
