You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
Yeah I had this grand plan to bring flaming dr pepper shots to some girls and say "these shots are hot, but not as hot as you" but instead I lit the bar on fire
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
Randomize