Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with someone crawling around my carpet for 3 hours trying to pick up spilled coke...
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with ME crawling around your carpet for 3 hours trying to save my investment.
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
My life has turned into sitting in the driveway listening to Total Eclipse of the Heart while staring at the Blue Moon. Hey, August. Let's be nice. I need help.
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
Randomize
