it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
We were destined to go to rehab together
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
Randomize
